How to make macaroni and cheese… the right way

Dear Daughter,

If you have inherited my culinary genes, then you might be in trouble. While my mother and sister are excellent cooks, I seem to have missed that gift, and the passion. Not that my food tastes bad, it’s fine, it’s just that I don’t really enjoy cooking like some women do. To me it’s a chore. And that makes me sad.

There are a few staple dishes I feel I have mastered, however. And one of those is the Almighty Macaroni and Cheese. Yum.

I rarely ever buy mac and cheese because it’s all kinds of unhealthy, and I know if I kept it in the house I would have no qualms about eating it for breakfast, lunch and dinner. So when we do have it, it’s a rare treat. But back in college, mac and cheese was a main player in my weekly diet. (So were soft tortilla shells topped with melted cheddar cheese… and I wonder why I gained weight during that time?) So I became a master chef of the M&C dish. You should be honored that I am coming down to your level to share my tips with you.

Here’s the secret to making macaroni and cheese the right way…

Make it exactly like it tells you to on the box.

That’s it! As long as you follow the directions verbatim, you’ll be treated to a wealth of deliciousness in a bowl. The trick is to add the ingredients in the order that’s given: butter, milk, then cheese. Some people add the cheese first, then the milk, but that waters it down, you see. Also, you have to measure the butter and milk with a measuring device so that you use the exact amount required. People who try to guesstimate the measurements always screw it up.

And don’t even try to add things into it like mushrooms or hot dogs. No, M&C is meant to be left alone. It’s the holy grail; adding other foods to it will only unsanctify it.

So, Daughter, I may not teach you much about cooking but at least you now know how to make the one dish that matters… the one that makes everybody happy.

Love,
Mom

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